“To rise with Christ, we must die with Christ: we must ‘be away from the body and at home with the Lord’” (2 Corinthians 5:8). Last weekend – in response to the feast of Our Lady of Lourdes and its designation as world day of prayer for those who suffer - our thoughts centred on Jesus’ injunction to his disciples, “heal the sick”. After the example of the Lord himself, it is obviously our Christian duty to do all that we can to ensure that those in need receive care and support. The Church does this through its sacramental ministry and intercession, and by its own commitment to institutions which continue to incarnate Christ’s compassion (hospitals, care homes, etc), as well as its involvement in trying to ensure that civil society does not neglect its responsibilities to the most vulnerable. Care of the sick is one of the works of mercy and it must ever be seen as a hallmark of those who try to follow Christ, but while we strive for the quality of being of each individual (the Catholic tradition has always been “pro-life” in its fullest definition) we do believe that the experience of dying is not the ultimate failure of medical intervention but rather the reason for our existence in the first place. As a life moves towards its climax it should be supported in every way possible (the rites of the Church, palliative care, etc) but death should be seen not as defeat, but as the moment of grace when we become what God has always intended us to be.
Just as the Church provides for us in our passing (the final commendation of the dying, “Go forth, Christian soul”, repays regular reading) so its liturgy in death offers all that is necessary on our final journey. One of the sad realities of the moment is to see how many Catholics seem to have fallen in with the current (secular) trend to laud people who have died. Memorial services and thanksgivings may have their place for those who do not share our understanding of what happens after death, but our belief is that none of us in our dying is free from sin and that we face a judgment in which all excuse and pretence is finally stripped away. We must not fear this judgment because we know the nature of the Judge is all mercy and love, but none of us can pretend that this final reckoning – when we see ourselves as we truly are (or perhaps, more devastatingly, as we could and should have been) – will be anything other than searing. In death, our fundamental and crucial need is not for others to speak well of us, but that they should pray for the forgiveness of our accumulation of wrong choices and accompany us with their ongoing affection – what then matters is not what has been, but what is to come. “Let us help and commemorate them. If Job’s sons were purified by their father’s sacrifice, why should we doubt that our offerings for the dead bring them some consolation? Let us not hesitate to help those who have died and to offer our prayers for them” (St John Chrysostom).
It is right and sensible that we should leave clear instructions as to our funeral so that our executors are left in no doubt as to our wishes. For the Catholic, this should include a Requiem Mass in which we ask God’s mercy and invite those we love to pray for us. Our Easter faith is secure and we are not afraid -“for life is to be with Christ, where Christ is there is life, there is the kingdom” (St Cyprian) – but we are also conscious of our own frailty and we need to be realistic: in the words of the Roman Canon (the first eucharistic prayer): “Father accept this offering from your whole family. Grant us your peace in this life, save us from final damnation and count us among those you have chosen”.
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